What’s this all about? How is this supposed to happen? The fear of judgement — resentment — resistance and pressure.
The ‘But You Don’t look sick. Those dreaded words! This leads me to a thesaurus to find the complete opposite of how I feel inside… Putting on a bit of make-up — some nice clothes — perhaps even getting out a favourite handbag.
All that does is disguise what’s inside: behind the eyes. A necessity of chronic conditions. Make the effort —look after yourself first. Manage the basics. Then deep breathing is required to exit the calm and controlled routine.
Enter the complex world that exists beyond the door —past the gate — into the car — arriving at the destination. Fear and anxiety are already faced.
Distraction is the key — the desire to forget, to dismiss the turmoil inside and have that moment of being part of something. To enjoy some special time with a loved one. Doing something I love.
It may not be what I used to be able to do but it is better than many can manage.
This still needs to be carefully measured. Planning and preparation are key even for a simple step to happen.
Slowly building towards a brighter future — one where smiles are real and laughter heartfelt.
Read But You Don’t Look Sick Spoon Theory here: https://butyoudontlooksick.com/articles/written-by-christine/the-spoon-theory/
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